Have you ever felt like you’re falling behind in life? As though your 20s or 30s have come and gone, and you’re still unsure of where you’re headed or what you’re meant to be doing?
It’s a feeling many of us experience, but it’s rarely discussed openly. We live in a world where comparison runs rampant, especially when scrolling through social media. The success stories of our peers, celebrities, and influencers are front and center, making us feel as though we’ve somehow missed the boat. But what if the pressure to “have it all figured out” by a certain age is entirely misplaced?
The Myth of a Straightforward Path
When I turned 30, I was overwhelmed with feelings of directionlessness. I had a mountain of debt, was diagnosed with ADHD and depression, and felt like my career was nothing more than a dead-end job that didn’t require the degree I’d worked so hard to earn. On top of that, the comparison trap was constantly looming over me. Every time I opened my phone, I saw people living lives I envied—people who seemed more successful, happier, and more “together” than I could ever be.
I had been conditioned for so long to expect a clear, step-by-step roadmap to life. From childhood, we’re taught that after high school, you go to college, get a degree, work your way up the corporate ladder, buy a home, get married, and then—retirement. But what happens when that blueprint doesn’t fit the reality of life in 2024?
A World of Uncertainty
The truth is, no one has it all figured out. Not the influencers on Instagram or the professionals you admire. No matter how perfectly curated their lives appear, they’re still navigating their own struggles. They, too, are figuring things out as they go.
It’s easy to fall into the trap of comparing yourself to others, but it’s important to understand that the playing field has shifted dramatically. What once seemed like a straightforward path to success—getting an education, a stable job, a house—has become increasingly out of reach for many. The cost of living has skyrocketed, and the traditional milestones of adulthood no longer hold the same significance they once did.
The Realities of the Gig Economy
We’ve entered an era where the gig economy is replacing traditional office jobs. Inflation is higher than ever, and the once-promising dream of homeownership feels like a distant hope. But that doesn’t mean we’ve failed or that we’re lost. It simply means that the timeline we’ve been told to follow no longer applies. Comparing your progress to your parents’ or peers’ achievements is an exercise in futility.
The truth is, no one’s journey looks the same. There are people in their 70s discovering new passions and people in their 20s making millions. And that’s perfectly okay. We’re all on different paths.
Breaking Free from Society’s Expectations
At some point, I realized that I had been basing my decisions on what others thought of me. I avoided pursuing my passions, convinced that I’d fail or be ridiculed. I waited for the “perfect” moment to start a YouTube channel, but that moment never came. It wasn’t until I turned 33 that I finally had the courage to pick up the camera and press record.
I’m still far from where I thought I’d be by now, but I’ve learned to let go of the pressure to conform to a specific timeline. Age is just a number. Whether you’re 30, 40, or 70, it’s never too late to pursue what sets your soul on fire. The key is to take that first step, no matter how small, and trust that progress will follow.
The Shift in Perspective
So, if you feel lost, unaccomplished, or behind in life, know this: you are not alone. It’s normal to feel uncertain, especially when society’s expectations weigh so heavily on us. But I urge you to shift your perspective. Instead of dwelling on missed opportunities or comparing your timeline to others, focus on where you are now. You still have so much potential, and there’s no limit to what you can accomplish.
As I look back on my own journey, I’m reminded of what my mom once told me: “As you get older, you’ll start to care less about what others think of you.” And she was right. The more I let go of societal expectations and started making decisions based on what truly makes me happy, the more fulfilling my life became.
Your Life, Your Journey
If you’re in your 30s and wondering where your life is going, remember this: success is not confined to your 20s or 30s. It’s a myth that life is a race with a fixed timeline. Your achievements, passions, and happiness are not dictated by when you “should” have accomplished something. They are determined by your willingness to take action, no matter your age.
You have your entire life ahead of you. So, stop waiting for things to align perfectly. Take the leap. Try new things. Be curious. And most importantly, don’t give up hope.
You’re not behind. You’re exactly where you need to be.